A couple of years ago I learnt about something that literally changed my life… and took my relationship to the next level.
Before then, I was doing it wrong – and beautiful, you probably are too.
I don’t know about you, but I was taught to treat people how you’d like to be treated.
The problem with that is that how I’d want to be treated and how you want to be treated might be polar opposites.
We are speaking different languages… different love language that is.
I’ve always appreciated acts of service – people that I love doing things that I love for me. Doing something helpful without me having to ask, using their initiative help make my life easier… when they do, I feel loved. And because I grew up thinking that I should treat people how I wanted to be treated I used to bend over backwards doing things for people that I would have loved. I’d always feel disappointed when I didn’t get the response that I expected..
“Are you serious, I’ve spent all day cleaning the house for you and you don’t even care?”
“I just made you the most delicious dinner ever, spent hours slaving away in the kitchen and all you’re giving me is a ‘thanks’..”
I grew tired… Ended up resenting people… And never felt appreciated.
Yet, there I was being showered with expensive presents, being given payrises and being cuddled up to and I just didn’t appreciate it.
NONE of my relationships were working… because we were all speaking different love languages.
We were all treating each other how WE wanted to be treated instead of asking them a few simple questions;
“What love language do you speak?”
“What things do you appreciate?”
“What would make you feel loved?”
I was just assuming.. and you probably are too.
Below are short summaries of the 5 UNIVERSAL LOVE LANGUAGES read through them and work out which you think you fit best with.. then ASK the 5 closest people to you and ask yourself if you’ve been treating them how they want to be treated.
Trust me, this is not only going to help your relationships but it’s also going to mean that you’re getting treated how you want to be – and how AWESOME would that be?!
It will make gift giving easier, your relationship flow and although it may take effort and adjusting at first – will change your life.
Eye contact, shared activities and deep & meaningful conversations make this person feel loved. Sharing quality time with their loved one is important to this person.
Loves little gifts and surprises and feels loved when their partner showers them in presents.
Words of Affection
Compliments, love notes and encouragement make this person feel loved.
This person loves affection and being touched. Sex to this person is more than just doing the deed it’s a deep connection and if they don’t get it for a while they feel unloved.
Acts of service
This person feels loved when their partner or loved one helps them out with chores or does things for them but only when they are done out of love not obligation.
Let me know your thoughts in the comments box below – what’s your love language?
Do you have a soul sister that would love to know about this? Make sure you share this article with them!
With love today & always,